A Simple Country Mouse

I'm sitting down writing today and yet I really don't know where this particular blog post is going. It's been a day of just cleaning and constantly disciplining the kids and having to hear how I'm not good enough. It's been rough. The kids are being little monsters today, the house looks like a disaster, and I'm losing my mind. Correction, I think I've already lost my mind. There is a mountain of laundry spilling down the stairs, presents covering the laundry room and bathroom, tree needles everywhere, wrapping paper bits scattered like confetti, and my kids managed to throw the kid sized quad down the stairs. There is bubble wrap and popped packing bubbles all over the living room that the kids pulled out of the garbage to pop and then leave everywhere. A small mountain of laundry overflowing on the chair to be folded, and the dishes are all over the counter. The kids have been getting into everything! They've been talked to, yelled at, spanked, and pu...

I've got to be honest. This week has sucked. There is no other way to cut it. I've been sick most of the last week and a half. My son was sick for a couple days, and so was my daughter. I've had no energy and not much sleep while trying to get the house clean to have guests for my daughter's ballet recital this last Sunday. Then things had to go and get worse. Thursday my husband called me while on the truck to tell me that his sister who is pregnant just got some bad news. The baby has Edwards syndrome. There are not many babies that make it to term and the ones who do only have a 5-10% chance of making it to even a year. It was devastating to hear. This little sweet baby whom we haven't even met yet but love so deeply has so little a chance to make it. While I don't talk about it much, I've lost one myself. The grief eases with time, but it never truly goes away. I wouldn't wish this on anyone, but especially not my sister in law. We can't do any...

I know you are hurting right now. I know life seems like it is about to fall apart and all you want is for it all to go away. For it all to be fixed. I know you want it to go back to normal. I know you wish it was different. I know. But it's not. The pain and hurt is still there. The worry and stress seem like they are going to drown you. It feels like you can't see the light in the dark. You feel alone and lost. You feel like there's no one who understands. You feel like you can't get out. That it won't end. The despair is overwhelming and it's all you can do to hang on to the tiny little string of hope you have left. But there is hope. Not just your tiny string, but also the small strings of hope of all those who love you. Together they form a solid rope you can hang onto. A tapestry of love to wrap yourself in. It will end eventually. You will get out, and there are those who understand. They are standing next to you, and they will not falter in holding y...

How many lies over the years have you been told about yourself that are on constant repeat in your head because you think they are truth? Me? I've got more than I'd ever like to admit. Before today I have always said I'm not a great baker, but I'm a decent cook. A few people growing up told me that my baking wasn't very good because my baking wasn't as good as xyz's in their life. I don't think they realized at the time how much damage that did to an influenceable young teenager. I used to bake cookies, pies, breads, shortbreads, all kinds of stuff. My brother loved my apple pies so much he wanted them instead of a birthday cake. You can't imagine how much that meant to me...until a few adults I looked up to greatly put me down so harshly. It wasn't just then either. I've had cupcakes explode and then some how implode. Don't ask. I literally have no idea. So eventually, I just stopped baking altogether. As an adult, I realized in my hea...

You ever feel like everything is just so overwhelming? Where there is this giant list of things to do and you don't feel like there's enough time to do it all? Or maybe your relationships are just suddenly totally not what you thought they were? You find out something that rips the rug out from under you and you're suddenly wondering where the floor beneath you is and how you're going to find your footing again? Do you ever feel like your brain is going 400 miles per hour and you have so much going on in it you can't even see straight let alone actually get anything done?  Believe me when I say I feel ya. I really do. Honestly I think everyone feels like this from time to time. And some more than others. As a mom I feel like this a lot. It always feels like just when I think that I've got things under control the whole world decides to take me for a spin and remind me that I don't always have everything under control. As someone who likes to have contro...

Sorry I haven't posted in a long, long while guys. I haven't forgotten, it's just that my computer has been glitchy. That won't be a problem anymore here shortly. Anyways, onto today's topic. While I was in the grocery store this morning I had the most interesting few run-ins. Allow me to set the stage. Today was the first day that it was rather chilly in quite some time. Chilly enough to actually warrant sweaters, full jeans and actual shoes, not flip-flops. As Sam doesn't have many cardigans yet (she will be getting some for her birthday, but just not yet) I decided to put her in this utterly adorable little light jacket that looks quite like something that stepped out of the roaring twenties. Pearls, ruffles and all mind you. Clay was quite cozy in his little preppy sweater (not usually a huge fan, but this one is really handsome on him), and I was in a cozy flannel that I haven't gotten to wear all summer. Mind you I had quite forgotten about this p...

So today I decided to be slightly insane. I decided in my lack of coffee haze of the morning that rearranging the living room, doing dishes, making pizza and pancakes, several loads of laundry (this included me throwing it all down the stairs. It seemed more efficient at the time.), and of course attempt to get everything put away afterwards was a good idea to tackle in one day. Oh, and did I mention blog? Granted to be fair the kids, Josh, and I have all been sick off and on for the last three weeks, and before that we had gotten home from a long trip. So the house has been kinda on the back burner aside from the basics of a little laundry and keeping up on the dishes. I finally have the time and the energy to tackle it all. Ok, rephrase. I thought I had the time and energy. Turns out it's a bigger project than I thought. Ok so a bigger project meaning it will take me two days to get this house Martha Stewart worthy and not one. Oh well. You know even though I'm behind on cl...

My brother sent me a text last night with the sweetest thing in it. He told me he was about to have this new video out that I should watch. For those of you who are just starting to read, my brother is the Producer of Crunk Cabins Studios and Six Guns Productions. He films videos, writes and produces music, and produces music for local artists where he lives. He has written, filmed, edited, and produced a couple of movies, produced at least 3 albums, and done some hilarious video sketches. All by the age of 19. I'm pretty darn proud of him. So when he told me there was going to be a new one, I was excited. Little did I know what was coming. As soon I got the link to the video I pulled it up only to discover this wasn't he usual type of video. It was in fact a video about A Simple Country Mouse. It was so sweet and it reminded me why I do this. Why I blog and why I'm expanding my horizons slowly but surely. Why I'm making a point to sit down and blog more often. It tou...

Good lord who knew how much stuff you need for traveling with two toddlers and two adults for 5 days? Not to mention all the little things you need to do before you an even leave?!? It's crazy. For example my to do list before leaving: Vacuum-incase of food on the carpet...kids...don't want mice Sweep-no sugar ants please Mop-same reason as above Laundry-need clean clothes to pack Empty the washer-do you have any idea what happens if you leave wet clothes in there to long? If not consider yourself lucky. Take out all the trash-5 day old trash...ewwww. Dishes-nasty dishes for 5 days...no thank you. Wipe down counters and stove-sugar ants get every where...I think they have super powers. Clean out coffee pot-nasty old coffee when I am struggling to see straight the first morning we are home? Yeah, NOPE!!! Clean out the fridge-old gross gone bad food...hard pass please. Clean both kids' rooms-I plan on dropping them in bed the moment we get home as it's probabl...

Now if you've been reading this blog for any amount of time you likely know I'm a total coffee nut. But what you may not know is that in the last year I've become a bit of a makeup nut too. I got this subscription to Ipsy which sends you 5 samples in an adorable little bag once a month for $10.00 a month. I love, love, love it! Today I just received my new Ipsy bag and am trying some new stuff in my favorite coffee. So I thought I'd do a blog reviewing the products just for kicks. Maybe I'll start that every month just for fun and so you all can have some new fun products to think about trying. So let's start with coffee. Lariat Coffee Roasters is my absolute favorite coffee roasters of all time. They have a variety of blends and roasts that range from light to dark roasts and a couple of good espresso roasts. They have a cold brew that is to die for that is from brew to bottle in 48 hours. If you've ever tried to make cold brew you know its not always eas...

As I have been writing on the same post for several days now and am still trying to finish it up so you all can catch up on the insanity of our house, I decided today I'd just post a few of my favorite BBQ recipes I've come across over the years. Steak- Marinade: Soy sauce Worcestershire sauce Yellow or Dijon mustard Olive oil Garlic Pepper Balsamic or white vinegar (I prefer balsamic) Your favorite cut of steak. In a gallon sized ziplock bag add ingredients to your taste. Then add steak and leave in the fridge for a couple hours or overnight. Toss it on the grill and cook through to your liking. I prefer blue rare, but that's uncommon. Garden Caesar- Romaine lettuce-chopped Croutons Light Caesar dressing Cherry tomatoes Chevre goat cheese-crumbled Toss in a bowl and serve. Heart Attack Taters- Baby red potatoes or Yukon Gold Potatoes Salt Pepper Garlic Chili powder Heavy cream Sour cream Butter Mozzarella cheese Cheddar cheese Parmesan c...

And the title pretty well says it all right there. It's been a few weeks of spiraling down into a rather dark hole of depression and frustration. Mother's day was just the icing on this crap cake. For starters, Josh's job decided that changing the schedule to fit the lazy, complaining, and useless drivers while punishing him for being the best driver on the run was a good idea. (I might be a tad angry with his superior and said superior's cohort. Which basically means, I'm biting my tongue and not ripping them both a new one for the most idiotic plan with so many holes a toddler could sink it in a water bowl the size of a pea. Just saying.) This meant he was gone for 6 days including Mother's day, home for 15 hours, and back on the d*** truck again. Props to the owner of the company though for jumping on a truck so Josh and his co-driver could get a couple days off to reset. Maybe he can help get things sorted and back on track from the rapidly sinking s*** sh...

I awoke this morning to the singing of birds as they gently roused me from a deep and restful sleep. They very sweetly brought me my dress, and the squirrels and mice had made coffee for me. The children were already dressed and so happy. They played together so nicely as I drank my coffee all while the sun shone oh so beautifully down on us all.  ....and then I woke up.... To one kid driving her hand into my breast as she tried to get a hug to wake me up, and the other who literally soaked his bed including pillow in poop and pee from over filling his diaper. Then I stumbled downstairs to make coffee only to discover that my Keurig was out of filtered water and my water pitcher that filters my water had nothing in it. Full pot it was, which takes so much longer. After which I managed to corral the kids for breakfast and sat down to try to drink my coffee. Several times yelling at them and a few spankings later, I finished my coffee standing up as I headed to the living ro...

Do you ever feel like the chaos in life never ends? Like it's wave after wave of utter crazy? Is it always the stories you tell about life is stuff you couldn't make up even if you wanted to? Yes? I feel you my friends. Life can be so utterly, completely, and totally insane. No matter how hard we try to make just a little sense and order out of life it seems as if chaos is determined to rule and reign. The last week or so (I've completely lost track of time to be honest) has been total chaos. Though what is chaos for me at least can provide humorous fodder for you...and me as I look back on it. Last week I suddenly realized on Monday that my in-laws and extended family were showing up in less than a week. Not the two weeks I thought I had left. To top it off, Easter morning was the same day they were coming in. As I stood there dumbfounded trying to figure out where I had lost a week, I also realized that not only was Easter a thing, but I hadn't done anything to get ...

Do you ever have those days where it literally feels like all you've done today is get up, discipline your kid and feed them? Yeah, that's been the last week or so for me. I swear there is a direct correlation between when the kids see their daddy regularly and when they don't. And let me tell you, when they don't all hell breaks lose. You'd think I have a little hellion running wild instead of the sweet kid I know her to usually be. Don't get me wrong, we have our phases of awful, but lately it's seemed to be nothing but awful. One thing after the next with no break in between. If it wasn't the kids, it was something to do with Josh. If not those, it was something else. Finances, parents, other parents, siblings, friends, anything and everything that could go wrong seemed to. Heck even my dishwasher wasn't wanting to behave. And I was at my end. I can't tell you how many times in the last week alone I've sat down at the end of the day and ...

Are you ever so tired you literally can't see straight? Or in my case, are you ever so tired you put the foil in the freezer and the plastic wrap in the fridge? So tired you try to take a shower only to realize you don't have a towel? Or you sit down to read for a few minutes only to wake up an hour later wondering why your kindle or book is suddenly on the floor and not in your hand? I do that last one a lot. More often than not we are so tired because we are so busy that we forget to just chill. I do that on a regular basis. I get so wrapped up in cleaning, cooking, taking care of kids, taking care of Josh, running to ballet or yoga, having guests, and just general crazy that I forget that I have to take care of me too. On a daily basis that means taking a few minutes out of each day to just stop and breathe. To drink a cup of coffee, and actually sit down for a meal. Though admittedly sometimes that last one is after I've tucked the kids in for bed. I'm trying to get...

Author and I were chatting today about how being told what we could and couldn't do with our appearance changed how we viewed the basics of being "girly". Things like makeup, hair, nails, and clothes. As a kid there was many times I was told by several individuals I looked horrible or, and I quote, "like a prostitute" because of something I was wearing that they didn't like. Come to think of it prostitute was thrown around a lot. For example, I was once told that only prostitutes wear red shirts and jeans. That I looked like one because I was wearing red lipstick, or that I looked "hard" because I put on black eyeliner. That hookers wore heels not respectable Christian women and definitely not country girls. That country girls don't do makeup or hair because it's pointless and stupid. Only jeans, t-shirts, and boots are allowed. Oh, and one of my favorites, "you aren't a true country girl if you like girly things." For the rec...

Normally I write about being a mom, or cooking, or the antics of everyday life in our crazy house, but today I want to go a different direction. Today I want to write about something that we so often forget about when we become parents. Being a spouse. (On a side note before I get started, I seem to have a horrid case of stupid fingers today. So bear with me here please.)  As a mom sometimes I get so caught up in being mom that I forget I'm not just a mom. I'm a woman and a wife too. That means that while I've got kids to take care of, I've also got a husband to love on too. On the flipside, my hubby is not just a father, but a husband too. A husband that's got to love on his wife. Recently Josh and I haven't even been in the same book, let alone on the same page. And I won't lie, it's been really rough. It's been hard trying to figure out how to love on him. I haven't felt like I had the energy or the drive to love him as I should becau...

There's this point in every parent's life when you suddenly hit a wall. This wall seems to be to big to climb, go around, dig under, or drill through. You look at this wall and well let's be honest here, you break down and cry. You feel like a failure. You feel like the world's worst parent because of X, Y, and Z. X- You've spent your whole morning accomplishing nothing more than screaming/disciplining your kid constantly for a whole slew of seemingly endless shenanigans. Y- You can't even get the dishes done without stopping 500 times for hugs, spankings, timeouts, oh and of course the kids beating on each other for no apparent reason. Z- Your kid is a monster...or at least your 99% sure it is. So much so you've even started calling them an it just because you're completely sure this isn't your child. It's a monster that looks, sounds, and even smells like your kid but there's no way this little beasty could possibly have come from your loin...

There is one thing that will save a mom in most suburbia areas when she's got a sick kid and needs emergency supplies like Gatorade and juice. UberEats. If I didn't know better I'd say it was invented for that very reason. For a mom who currently has one kid curled up in bed watching Netflix on her kindle (another couple of wonderful inventions) as she's spent the morning throwing up, having a delivery service bring me coffee, juice, Gatorade, and food so I don't have to try to get to the store is a life saver. A simple to use app that only takes a couple minutes to set up, and allows you access to all kinds of restaurants and even coffee places. They are always adding new places and expanding what you can order. You can choose your favorite places and have them saved right at the top for easy access. Every driver I've ever had has been super sweet and always pretty well on time. You get to rate how the food is, the delivery, and add tips for the drivers all in...

I know I haven't posted in forever. Forgive me please. I had a post all set to finish up when I got some horrid news and have been scrabbling to right our lives ever since. It's been crazy and very, very, very stressful. But hey, on the upside things are looking up finally. Man was last year a doozy. You know I've posted before how just because it's a new year that last year's problems don't always go away. Well that's what I'm dealing with right now. Just before Christmas I received some news that just about ruined our Christmas, and New Year's for that matter. I won't get into it, but suffice to say it was pretty devastating to Josh and I. We've spent the last several weeks trying to get things back in order and while we are almost there with most of it, emotionally we are still pretty damaged. It's amazing how much one thing can effect so much, and how someone's flippant words can cause so much damage. For those of you who don...